Thursday, April 01, 2010

End Times

A headline birthed from the bowels of hell. This could be the final sign for end times:

Toby Keith joins LL Cool J in surprise at being used for Palin’s Fox News show.


Speaking of "I'll wear it if someone else buys it" V-PILF:

Post-Palin Alaska has largest debt burden in US:
"Sarah Palin has long sold herself as a fiscal conservative, arguing against the Democrats' health overhaul on the grounds that the nation simply can't afford it.

But when the former vice presidential candidate resigned as governor of Alaska in the summer of 2009, she left the state with a 70 percent debt-to-GDP ratio -- the highest state debt burden in the United States.

By comparison, crisis-stricken California has a debt ratio of less than 40 percent. All the more confounding about Alaska's debt is the fact that it is an oil-producing region with a small population to share in that wealth. Oil-rich Alberta, Canada, for example, collects no sales tax and still managed to retire its debt entirely in 2004."

Once again, the Onion's satire is prescient. I'm fully on board with abolishing the Senate.

At the very least the filibuster rule needs to be changed.

But, yeah, they make a good case for canning the Senate:

U.S. Government To Save Billions By Cutting Wasteful Senator Program | The Onion - America's Finest News Source:
"'I'm sure when it was first introduced the U.S. Senate seemed like a worthwhile public service that would aid vast segments of the population and play an important role in the years to come,' said Sheila McKenzie, president of the watchdog group the American Center for Responsible Government. 'But in reality, this program has been a complete and utter failure.'

'It simply doesn't work,' she added. 'We've been pouring taxpayer dollars into this outdated relic for far too long.'"

Now THIS is smart change I can believe in.

Corporations in the U.S. are far from being great innovators. They do one thing only. Hoover up money. They want cheap, disposable labor. Gov has a role here.

White House Launches Push For Workplace Flexibility:

"Once you realize that, there are a bunch of employer practices and policy proposals that suddenly make a lot of sense: Encouraging telecommuting, giving people time off for family emergencies, enabling flexible schedules, allowing employees to swap shifts, and so on.

At the White House on Wednesday, Michelle and Barack Obama held a summit meeting to discuss, as the president put it, 'what we can do -- as business leaders and advocates, as employees and as government officials -- to modernize our workplaces to meet the needs of our workforce and our families.'

As part of his push, Obama cited a new White House report which concludes that flexible workplace rules could increase productivity."


"'[U]ltimately, it reflects our priorities as a society -- our belief that no matter what each of us does for a living, caring for our loved ones and raising the next generation is the single most important job that we have. I think it's time we started making that job a little easier for folks,' he said."

"Advocates of greater workplace flexibility consistently said their biggest obstacle is managers who can't let go of the need to exercise authority over employees -- in person. 'Sometimes flexibility requires sharing control,' said Peter Berg, a Michigan State University professor who tracks workplace issue. 'Sometimes there's a sense [among managers] that we don't necessarily want to share control.'"

Idiots. Git a brayn Morans!

Teabonics - a set on Flickr:
"These are signs seen primarily at Tea Party Protests.

They all feature 'creative' spelling or grammar.

This new dialect of the English language shall be known as 'Teabonics.'"

Speaking of idiots... sorry, I meant, Speaking of asshole idiots.

Hilarious. Big High Five to the fraternity.

Glenn Beck fans’ cars towed during ‘revival’ event | Raw Story:
"Glenn Beck told his audience in Orlando, Florida, on Saturday that Americans are 'worshipping cars.'

If that's so, then his audience must have felt it was sheer blasphemy that their cars were towed from a nearby parking lot as they listened to the controversial commentator speak.

According to WFTV channel 9 in Orlando, 53 cars were towed out of a fraternity parking lot at the University of Central Florida on Saturday night, and all of them belonged to people who were attending Beck's American Revival Tour appearance at the nearby UCF Arena."

So, how would this work re: repossession?

Calif. woman gets 6 months for fake breasts heist:
"An Orange County woman's new breasts cost her six months in jail. Yvonne Jean Pampellonne was sentenced Monday in Westminster for using a fraudulent line of credit to obtain $12,000 in cosmetic surgery, including breast implants and liposuction."

1 comment:

Shannon said...

The Toby Keith/LL Cool J/Sarah Palin with her own tv show thing is just an April Fool's joke, right?