Monday, May 04, 2009

Tortured Logic

Yup. This is about right.

BREAKING: Obama to nominate Jesus Christ to Supreme Court -- Republicans Announce Filibuster:

"In a breaking story still emerging, President Barack Obama has announced the nomination of Jesus Christ of Nazareth to fill the vacancy on the Supreme Court to replace the retiring justice David Souter.

Republicans hastily called a press conference to announce outrage at the selection, and an immediate filibuster."

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By the early afternoon, republican opposition to the nomination had begun to take shape, as Fox News unveiled a two hour special, Jesus Christ: What you Didn't Know.:

"What do we really know about this 'Jesus of Nazareth,' if that is his real name. Some say he spends time with prostitutes!" said Sean Hannity in the opening intro, which featured ominous music over still-frames of the young Jesus. "He's from the middle east. Could he have associations with terrorism that we don't yet know about?"

Later, on The O'Reilly Factor, Bill O'Reilly continued the argument. "I don't see how any patriotic American can support this nomination. The guy was a carpenter, gimmie a break! Who are we gonna nominate next? Harrison Ford? I call on all patriotic Americans to join me in this war on Christ!"

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No one could have predicted....

Think Progress � Specter: ‘I Did Not Say I Am A Loyal Democrat’

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Yay, as you walk through the shadow of the valley of torture...

What would Jesus do? Apparently waterboard the fuck out of you, 'cause Jesus knows a thing or two about torture... according to Mel Gibson.

Right to a tortured life.

Churchgoers more likely to back torture of suspected terrorists: poll:
"More than half of people who attend services at least once a week — 54 percent — said the use of torture against suspected terrorists is “often” or “sometimes” justified. Only 42 percent of people who “seldom or never” go to services agreed, according the analysis released Wednesday by the Pew Forum on Religion & Public Life.

White evangelical Protestants were the religious group most likely to say torture is often or sometimes justified — more than 6 in 10 supported it. People unaffiliated with any religious organization were least likely to back it. Only 4 in 10 of them did."
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We figured out how to do this a long time ago. Republichristians so love to regress, though.

The Greatest Interrogator of All Time :

"Stephens did not eschew torture out of mercy. This was no squishy liberal: the eye was made of tin, and the rest of him out of tungsten. (Indeed, he was disappointed that only 16 spies were executed during the war.) His motives were strictly practical. 'Never strike a man. It is unintelligent, for the spy will give an answer to please, an answer to escape punishment. And having given a false answer, all else depends upon the false premise.'"
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The kids are all right.

Gays have right to attend high school proms | detnews.com | The Detroit News:

"A flyer announcing this year's prom at Jim Hill High School in Jackson, Miss., stated upfront what at many schools is usually a far more subtle message to gay students: 'All dates must be of the opposite sex.'

The flyer, posted around the school, fortunately caught the eye of Brittany Crowell, a heterosexual senior who, thanks to her volunteer work at the American Civil Liberties Union, knows the rights of her gay friends.

The 17-year-old took one of the flyers to the ACLU, which wrote to the principal and district superintendent to explain that banning same-sex dates from the prom would violate the court-recognized constitutional rights of gay students.

Two days later, Brittany spotted a 'revised announcement' on bulletin boards: Gone were all four references to allowing only dates of the opposite sex. (School officials declined my repeated requests for comment.)"
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Giddy-up.

Shoals was the Kentucky of horse racing in 1800s | TimesDaily.com| Florence, AL:

"Horse racing is a Kentucky passion. Some of the top horse farms and biggest races in the world take place there.

Go back in time about 175 years, though, and the Shoals had a similar reputation.

The Forks of Cypress plantation in Florence was once home to not only a horse track, but also some of the greatest race horses in American history. Descendants of horses that once roamed the pastures at Forks of Cypress went on to win the Kentucky Derby, the Preakness and even the Triple Crown.

'The Forks of Cypress played a significant role in the development of the thoroughbred horse in America,' said Curtis Flowers, of Florence, who has researched the history of horse racing in north Alabama."
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2 comments:

Matt Osborne said...

Nowhere in that horse-racing article does it mention that *gambling* went on at these events.

I am shocked, SHOCKED to find a history of gambling in this establishment!

JPW said...

I'm equally shocked that the article make no mention that several generations of Florentines drank beer and smoked weed at the ruins of the Forks while in High school.

Why, gambling, drinking beer and smoking weed are as Alabamian as voting against your best interests.

Dug your current LTE, M.