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I saw this made up piece of crap floating around on MySpace bulletins a couple of days ago. Debunking bullshit as soon as it happens.

So when your dipshit conservative cousin drops this in your in-box, fire back with this article from the Army Times:

Officer: Part of anti-Obama e-mail was wrong - - Army Times:

"An Army officer’s negative e-mail account of Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama’s visit with the troops in Afghanistan that set the blogosphere ablaze prompted Army officials to correct aspects of the e-mail and resulted in a statement from the message’s author that “some of the information that was put out in my e-mail was wrong.”

The e-mail, signed by Capt. Jeffrey S. Porter at Bagram Airbase, characterized Obama’s July 19 visit with soldiers"
.......

The Army refuted the accuracy of the account of the Obama visit.

“These comments are inappropriate and factually incorrect,” Bagram spokesman Lt. Col. Rumi Nielson-Green told the New York Daily News

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Hard work, y'all. Vapid light-weight.

BBC NEWS | Asia-Pacific | Shopping lures Rice after office:

"When Condoleezza Rice's term in office ends, she is looking forward to 'getting back to shopping', she says."

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Kind of a 'Robin Hood' thing going on here. But I guess he still made them pay, so not really.

He hi-jacked someones job.

Police: Man Stole Miami-Dade Buses, Drove Them On Routes:

"According to Miami-Dade police, Harris would take the buses from several Miami-Dade Transit bus depots in the county and drive the buses on their routes, picking up and dropping off passengers along the way. He would then return the buses at the end of the day."

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When will this senseless gun on machinery violence end?!?

Angry man shoots lawn mower for not starting:

"MILWAUKEE - A Milwaukee man was accused of shooting his lawn mower because it wouldn't start. Keith Walendowski, 56, was charged with felony possession of a short-barreled shotgun or rifle and misdemeanor disorderly conduct while armed."

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Best commercial ever.

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Old Lady is My Running Mate

Vote for DBT's MySpace Songs!

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'Don't hit on Hillary, bring us all back, let her do that stuff. Leave her alone, you don't need to do that, you are higher than that. Bring us up higher than that,' Weiss said with 82 years of experience.'

Wilmington , NC. April 28, 2008"

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No comment necessary. Gnashing of teeth required:

US troop deaths hit 7-month high in Iraq:

"The killings of three U.S. soldiers in separate attacks in Baghdad pushed the American death toll for April up to 47, making it the deadliest month since September."

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I like the style of writing in this personal diary over at DK. Wish I had some of these skills.

Daily Kos: Crazy Sorrow:

"I once started a novel titled Crazy Pussy, but abandoned it later as an exercise in bad judgment. It was based on a woman I once knew. Unspeakable things had been done to her. She was a strange mix of beauty and darkness, tenderness and rage, passion and loathing. She captured me without my having fired a shot in my own defense. Our’s was a raging roller coaster of earthly delights and bone deep horror."

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Thanks for the spiders.... and trippy bands... and glow sticks.

Albert Hofmann, father of drug LSD, dies in Switzerland:

"Albert Hofmann, the father of the mind-altering drug LSD whose medical discovery inspired — and arguably corrupted — millions in the 1960s hippie generation, has died. He was 102."

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Monkey Love Cost

I can't bring myself to blog about the ridiculousness that is the Iowa caucus. How snow birds from lilly white Iowa get to, essentially, pick the Dem and Rep nominee for the rest of the states (in theory) is baffling to me. My plan: All 50 primaries on one freakin' day.

Luckily, I stopped watching any sort of TV news a long time ago so I won't have to hear a bunch of talking heads with the vapors chirping about who is up and who is down. Their 'conventional wisdom' bores me to tears.

So, let's get a little crazy today. Sexy crazy. Sexy monkey crazy. Sexy monkey paying-for-it crazy.

Another somethin-somethin that should be legalized. I'm voting for whoever will back legalizing weed and prostitution.

Cost of coitus: Male monkeys pay for sex:

"On average, females had sex 1.5 times per hour.

But this rate jumped to 3.5 times per hour immediately after the female had been groomed by a male -- and her partner of choice was likely to be the hunky monkey that did the grooming.

Market forces also acted on the value of the transaction.

If there were several females in the area, the cost of buying sex would drop dramatically -- a male could 'buy' a female for just eight minutes of nit-picking.

But if there were no females around, he would have to groom for up to 16 minutes before sex was offered."

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Listed under 'no-shite'.

The egg head that did the study has a pretty good sense of humor, though. Check out the 2nd paragraph. You can never go wrong with a poot joke.

Cell phone users tie up traffic: study:

"CHICAGO (Reuters) - If you're late for work, a driver using a cell phone may be to blame. U.S. researchers said on Wednesday that people who use cell phones while behind the wheel impede the flow of traffic, clog highways and extend commute times.

'It's a bit like breaking wind in the elevator. Everyone suffers,' Peter Martin of the University of Utah's Traffic Lab said in a telephone interview."

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Hmmmmm.

Caffeine Soap Wakes You Up In The Shower:

"Shower Shock is soap with caffeine in it. You rub it all over that sexy naked body of yours, and next thing you know, you're wide f'ing awake. Simple as that. Each 4 oz bar has approximately 12 200mg caffeine servings."

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OK, I can't resist. Must bash the Douchebag-in-chief for being such a heinous doubche bag.

Bonus payments frozen - Army Times:

"The Army has temporarily halted bonus payments for more than 20 enlistment, re-enlistment and service extension programs pending enactment of authorizing legislation.

President Bush, to the surprise of Congress and the Defense Department, vetoed the fiscal 2008 Defense Authorization Act on Dec. 29 after months bargaining with House and Senate leaders."

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Grand Oral Pediphiles

Warning: Most of this post is not safe for work, home, or for anyone with an ounce of moral direction.

Jeebus, just look at the weekend Republican freakfest.

Trust in Jesus... Orally.

More allegations against Richard Roberts:

"Oral Roberts University President Richard Roberts now faces more shocking allegations in a lawsuit filed against him. A second petition was filed today in district court that includes the university's Board of Regents as a defendant. Inside the petition is a scandal vulnerability assessment which contains a web of new allegations. It claims Mrs. Roberts spent the night in the university's guest house with an underage male on 9 separate occasions."

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Lolita, Republican style:

Wisconsin GOP chair faces charges in enticement of teenage boy:

" Wisconsin GOP chair faces charges in enticement of teenage boy.

Brown County GOP Chairman Donald Fleischman has resigned his post, says a spokesperson, after being accused of enticement and fondling of an underage boy, reports the Green Bay Press-Gazette Saturday"

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It is a long fall from the top of those moral high-horses. Goose and gander ain't never seen eye to eye with this bunch.

Salt Lake Tribune - Dr. Laura son linked to lurid Web page:

"The soldier son of talk radio relationship counselor Laura Schlessinger is under investigation for a graphic personal Web page that one Army official has called 'repulsive.' The MySpace page, publicly available until Friday when it disappeared from the Internet, included cartoon depictions of rape, murder, torture and child molestation; photographs of soldiers with guns in their mouths; a photograph of a bound and blindfolded detainee captioned 'My Sweet Little Habib'; accounts of illicit drug use; and a blog entry headlined by a series of obscenities and racial epithets. "

And, shite, I haven't even checked the headlines for today yet. Who knows which combination of commandments some Republican is breaking today. I'm sure a Republican is coveting someone else's killing or something.

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So, hey, what's been going on with the guy that nobody wanted to have a beer with back in 2000.

Gore "deeply honored" by Nobel Prize win:

"Former Vice President Al Gore said today that he is 'deeply honored' to win the 2007 Nobel Peace Prize today along with a United Nations panel for their work fighting global warming. Gore, who is in the Bay Area today, said in a statement that plans to donate the proceeds to the Alliance for Climate Protection, a bipartisan non-profit organization working on the climate crisis. Gore is to meet with the group this morning in Palo Alto."

Past year: Emmy, Oscar, best selling book, Nobel Peace Prize, admired and respected around the world, all around badass.

Let's recap. Beer Boy or Leader Lion?

Daily Kos: Bush v Gore, The Aftermath:

"Did you hear that Gore won the Nobel Peace Prize? Yup. He did. And an Oscar and an Emmy.

Just so we are clear what that leaves us with, in this corner:

Former vice president Al Gore and a United Nations panel that monitors climate change were jointly awarded the Nobel Peace Prize today for their work educating the world about global warming and pressing for political action to control it. In a brief public appearance in California, Gore vowed to use the award to increase awareness and push for a more urgent response to climate change

And in that corner, hiding behind anyone in uniform:

President Bush is a competitive guy. But this is one contest he would rather lose. With 18 months left in office, he is in the running for most unpopular president in the history of modern polling.

Nice call by the SCOTUS in 2000. Do you think the Justices are proud today?"

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Yes, let's do check in with the SCROTUS.

BREAKING: SCOTUS Declares Bush the Nobel Peace Prize Winner:

"Oslo: A review of the ballots in the 2007 Nobel Peace Prize has shown that George W. Bush is the winner of the 2007 Nobel Peace Prize. James Baker III has been sent by the Bush Administration to coordinate efforts on the ground. The United States Supreme Court in a surprise vote of 5 to 4 have declared George W. Bush the winner of the 2007 Nobel Peace Prize. Justice Samuel Alito, writing for the majority, stated that 'allowing Al Gore to win the 2007 Nobel Peace Prize violates the spirit and intent of the Equal Protection Clause of the United States Consitution.' Justice Alito was joined in the majority decision by Justices Scalia, Thomas, Kennedy, and Chief Justice Roberts."

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But we won't say anything will we. We'll keep out mouths shut again just like last time. Be a 'Good German' now.

The ‘Good Germans’ Among Us - New York Times:

"“BUSH lies” doesn’t cut it anymore. It’s time to confront the darker reality that we are lying to ourselves."

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And the rich keep getting richer at the expense of the rest of us.

IRS says rich getting richer:

NEW YORK (Reuters) - The richest one percent of Americans earned a postwar record of 21.2 percent of all income in 2005, up from 19 percent a year earlier, reflecting a widening income disparity among different classes in the nation, the Wall Street Journal reported, citing new Internal Revenue Service data. ADVERTISEMENT The data showed that the fortunes of the bottom 50 percent of Americans are worsening, with that group earning 12.8 percent of all income in 2005, down from 13.4 percent the year before, the paper said. It said that while the IRS data goes back only to 1986, academic research suggests that the last time wealthy Americans had such a high percentage of the national income pie was in the 1920s."

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No happy ending today. Wouldn't be christian.

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They All Betray-Us

Officers of the Armed Forces are fair game for criticism. They aren't on the front lines getting shot at or torn apart by IEDs.

MoveOn was completely justified in its ad criticizing Betrayus b/c he's a damn lying shill for the White House and it was a GD debacle how the Republicans took the important time out of Congress to debate some stupid effing bill to shake a finger at them and for damn too many Democrats to vote for that finger shake. All involved should be ashamed. 1st freakin' amendment.

So now we've got to waste time again to make a point at the hypocrisy. FAUX news said this about the generals last week. Again, fair game and nothing wrong with it... except for the hypocrisy part.

Glenn Greenwald - Political Blogs and Opinions:

"As we learned from both our Senate and House last week, in the United States we must never 'attack the honor and integrity . . . of members of the United States Armed Forces.' All good patriots from both parties agree on this. That is why I was so shocked and outraged -- and more than a little upset -- when I went to FoxNews.com this morning and saw this: "

Our generals are betraying our soldiers . . . again.

This, however, is completely indefensible and the Pill-Popper should never work again.

Army of Dude: The Real Deal:

Blue Girl directed me to a very interesting story about Rush Limbaugh, who called veterans opposed to the war phony soldiers. Of course, this is the same Rush Limbaugh who threw a fit about the Moveon.org Petraeus ad, calling it 'contemptible' and 'indecent.' Apparently anyone in the military is above criticism as long as they agree with Rush's brave belief that we should be in Iraq 'as long as it takes.' And I use the term 'we' loosely, as I believe the closest Rush has ever gotten to combat was watching We Were Soldiers with surround sound."

.......

This is Chevy in Baghdad. Brian Chevalier was going to reenlist but decided against it before he was killed on March 14 during our first mission in Baqubah. His phony life was celebrated in a phony memorial where everyone who knew him cried phony tears. A phony American flag draped over his phony coffin when his body came home. It was presented to his phony mother and phony daughter.

I would be in awe if I ever met a real life soldier, and not a phony one like Bill, Matt or Brian Chevalier. Thank you, Rush Limbaugh, for telling me the difference. I hope your ass is ok.

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Damn, I already need a drink....

Ain't a matter of 'letting' its a matter of 'tryin' to stop 'em' where I come from...

Author: Letting kids drink early reduces binging

Rare Scotch whisky tops world record auction price:

"LONDON (AFP) - A 157-year-old whisky was sold for more than 29,000 pounds (41,500 euros/59,200 dollars) Friday, setting what is thought to be a world record auction price for a bottle of Scotch. ADVERTISEMENT The Bowmore single malt, which was bottled in 1850, was sold at McTear's auctioneers in Glasgow for 29,400 pounds to an anonymous telephone bidder, beating the distillery itself"

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Smokin' Legs

These are the Republican nutjobs that O'Lielly, Pill-popper Lush and the rest of the propaganda machine incite to violence with their BS. Shite like this boils my blood.

Consider me a violent progressive/liberal. Any f'ing conservative meat head that would rather use his fists than his mouth, look me up. I'll be happy to stomp your ass. Unfortunately it is the only thing you understand.

POSs plain and simple. Scum of the f'ing earth.

Check out the pictures, too.

The People Who Assaulted a Gold Star Father on September 15th:

"Carlos Arredondo, 47 year old father of two sons, arrived in the nation's capitol on Monday, 09/10/07 to share a memorial he has made to honor for his eldest son, Alex.

Carlos has visited thirty of the United States with the traveling memorial to his son Alexander. Lcpl. Alexander S. Arredondo, USMC was killed on 08/25/04. He was 20 years and 20 days old. The memorial consists of a casket, poster- size photographs of Alex when he graduated from boot camp, before his second tour in Iraq, lying in state at his wake, and a photo of Alex with his younger brother Brian. Saturday, September 15, 2007 consisted of first a rally, a march towards the capitol and then a die-in.

Carlos pulled the memorial along the march route approaching the rotunda near the capitol building. Several of the marchers requested for him to speak about the memorial where a crowd gathered around him. After finishing, several people walked with Carlos as he pulled the memorial. Several pictures of Alex dressed in his blues were attached to the display. As Carlos passed counter protesters, one man ripped a picture of Alex from the memorial. Carlos leaped on the man to retrieve the picture. It was at that point that approximately five others all began to attack Carlos by kicking him in the head, legs, stomach and back."

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When good journalist sell their souls.

When traditional media is broken....

Never, ever has this story been discredited. Never. Ever.

DAN RATHER: TASED AND CONFUSED Greg Palast

In September 2004 when Rather cowered, Bush was riding high in the polls. Now, with Bush’s approval ratings are below smallpox, Rather has come out of hiding to shoot at the lame duck. Thanks, Dan.

It began on September 8, 2004, when Rather, on CBS, ran a story that Daddy Bush Senior had, in 1968, put in the fix to get his baby George out of the Vietnam War and into the Texas Air National Guard. Little George then rode out the war defending Houston from Viet Cong attack.

The story is stone-cold solid. I know, because we ran it on BBC Television a year before CBS (see that broadcast here). BBC has never retracted a word of it.

But CBS caved. So did Dan.

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When traditional media works like it is suppose to.... exposing hypocrisy.

David Shuster should have his own show.

Blackburn tries to filibuster but Shuster ain't letting it happen.

"When has a newspaper ad ever killed anyone".

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Nuh, uh. We retain Jeebuseseses's's Survival Instincts.... wait... don't think Jeebus was all that good at survival..... nevermind.

Modern Humans Retain Caveman's Survival Instincts:

"Like hunter-gatherers in the jungle, modern humans are still experts at spotting predators and prey, despite the developed world's safe suburbs and indoor lifestyle, a new study suggests.

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Use hickory wood and a sweet sauce for the tastiest legs.

Best part is the owner of the leg is coming to reclaim it.

Man Buys Smoker, Finds Human Leg Inside:

"A man who bought a smoker Tuesday at an auction of abandoned items might have thought twice had he looked inside first."

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E-Titty

Thank Zeus we still have journalist like Bill Moyer.

Bill Moyers: 'Greed and God won four elections in a row' for Rove

What struck me about my fellow Texan, Karl Rove, is that he knew how to win elections as if they were divine interventions. You may think God summoned Billy Graham to Florida on the eve of the 2000 election to endorse George W. Bush just in the nick of time, but if it did happen that way, the good lord was speaking in a Texas accent.

Karl Rove figured out a long time ago that the way to take an intellectually incurious draft-averse naughty playboy in a flight jacket with chewing tobacco in his back pocket and make him governor of Texas, was to sell him as God’s anointed in a state where preachers and televangelists outnumber even oil derricks and jack rabbits. Using church pews as precincts Rove turned religion into a weapon of political combat -- a battering ram, aimed at the devil’s minions, especially at gay people.

It’s so easy, as Karl knew, to scapegoat people you outnumber, and if God is love, as rumor has it, Rove knew that, in politics, you better bet on fear and loathing. Never mind that in stroking the basest bigotry of true believers you coarsen both politics and religion.

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Appalling. This is supporting the troops?!?

Short of Purple Hearts, Navy tells vet to buy own:

"PEARLAND — Korean War veteran Nyles Reed, 75, opened an envelope last week to learn a Purple Heart had been approved for injuries he sustained as a Marine on June 22, 1952. But there was no medal. Just a certificate and a form stating that the medal was 'out of stock.' 'I can imagine, of course, with what's going on in Iraq and Afghanistan, there's a big shortage,' Reed said. 'At least, I would imagine so.' The form letter from the Navy Personnel Command told Reed he could wait 90 days and resubmit an application, or buy his own medal. After waiting 55 years, however, Reed decided to pay $42 for his own Purple Heart and accompanying ribbon — plus state sales taxes — at a military surplus store."

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Terrifying. This is the United States of America?!?

Homeland Security Enlists Clergy to Quell Public Unrest if Martial Law Ever Declared:

"Could martial law ever become a reality in America? Some fear any nuclear, biological or chemical attack on U.S. soil might trigger just that. KSLA News 12 has discovered that the clergy would help the government with potentially their biggest problem: Us. Charleton Heston's now-famous speech before the National Rifle Association at a convention back in 2000 will forever be remembered as a stirring moment for all 2nd Amendment advocates. At the end of his remarks, Heston held up his antique rifle and told the crowd in his Moses-like voice, 'over my cold, dead hands.'"

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First.... ow. Second.... I would tattoo them immediately with their initials.

Woman has rare identical quadruplets:

"HELENA, Mont. - A 35-year-old Canadian woman has given birth to rare identical quadruplets, officials at a Great Falls hospital said Thursday.

Karen Jepp of Calgary, Alberta, delivered Autumn, Brooke, Calissa and Dahlia by Caesarian section Sunday afternoon at Benefis Healthcare, said Amy Astin, the hospital's director of community and government relations. The four girls were breathing without ventilators and listed in good condition Thursday, she said. 'These babies are doing grand,' said Dr. Tom Key of Great Falls, the perinatologist who delivered the girls."

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Dammit! Why didn't I come up with this.

People of the Web - Hooter Heaven:

"Jason Grunstra's 'eureka' moment did not occur while sitting under an apple tree like Newton — nor while flying a kite in the rain, like Franklin. Then again, Grunstra wasn't busy discovering the law of gravity or the conductivity of electricity.

Grunstra's 'discovery' was this: Americans are obsessed with breasts. Ashley, a.k.a. Minxie, trades photos for donations to her next implant procedure. Appropriately enough, his eureka moment came in Las Vegas, at a bachelor party, in the company of strippers. One of the strippers had recently gotten breast implants. Another was sad because she could not afford them. So Grunstra did what any gentlemen would do — he started raising cash for the flat-chested one. 'I said, 'I've got five on it!'' he recalls. 'And everybody else said, 'I've got five on it, too.' By the end of the night we had $70 bucks.' That's a long way from the cost of a breast implant operation, which can run $4,000 and up. But for Grunstra, this was more than just crumpled dollar bills stuffed in a thong. This was a big idea."

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'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' just STFU

Shhhhhhhhh, be verwy, verwy, quiet.....

Walter Reed patients told to keep quiets:

"Soldiers at Walter Reed Army Medical Center’s Medical Hold Unit say they have been told they will wake up at 6 a.m. every morning and have their rooms ready for inspection at 7 a.m., and that they must not speak to the media.

“Some soldiers believe this is a form of punishment for the trouble soldiers caused by talking to the media,” one Medical Hold Unit soldier said, speaking on the condition of anonymity.

It is unusual for soldiers to have daily inspections after Basic Training."

The Pentagon also clamped down on media coverage of any and all Defense Department medical facilities, to include suspending planned projects by CNN and the Discovery Channel,

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Hush little baby, don't say a word.
Poppa's gonna buy you a quagmire in the desert.
If that quagmire last long,
Poppa's gonna treat you like a big fat turd.

Defending His Country, but Not Its 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' Policy:

"Q. Why didn't you come out sooner?

A.Eventually my notoriety -- 'the injured soldier' -- will wear off. And I can almost hear it now -- 'Oh, yeah, he's that gay Marine.' I'm okay with that. The truth is, something's wrong with this ban. I have to say something. I mean, you're asking men and women to lie about their orientation, to keep their personal lives private, so they can defend the rights and freedoms of others in this country, and be told, 'Well, oh, yeah, if you ever decide to really meet someone of the same sex and you want the same rights, sorry, buddy, you don't have the right.' That's one factor. The other factor is, we're losing probably thousands of men and women that are skilled at certain types of jobs, from air traffic controllers to linguists, because of this broken policy."

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My friend's Steve and Dani (who should be having a baby any day know) were the co-producers for We Were Soldiers. I took a weekend during filming and went and hung out with them on the set a few years back. Good fun, and a great story told.

Vietnam hero on film gets highest honor for valor:

"The battle and the pilots' deeds were described in the book 'We Were Soldiers Once ... and Young' by Gen. Harold Moore, commander of the battalion on the ground, and Joseph Galloway, the only war correspondent there for the entire battle.

It later was made into the 2002 movie 'We Were Soldiers,' starring Mel Gibson as Moore and Greg Kinnear as Crandall."

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Why can't we all just get along like these baby orangutans and tigers?

Because we grow up and if we're oragutans we sling shit at everybody and if we're tigers we maul then eat your ass.

Sounds about right.

Tiger, orangutan babies bond as�inseparable playmates:

"A pair of month-old Sumatran tiger twins have become inseparable playmates with a set of young orangutans, an unthinkable match in their natural jungle habitat in Indonesia's tropical rainforests.

The friendship between 5-month-old female baby primates Nia and Irma, and cubs Dema and Manis, has blossomed at the Taman Safari zoo where they share a room in the nursery.

After being abandoned by their mothers shortly after birth, the four play fight, nipping and teasing each other, and cuddling up for a shared nap when they are worn out."

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